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 I need stats for a cheese :O

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T O P I C    R E V I E W
Kajehase Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 01:06:20
Well, I found this in a Swedish parody-game, and I rather liked it. So - anyone care to help me give it its stats? (I've translated the text in case not everyone on Candlekeep speak Swedish)

Gorgonzola
A gorgonzola is a mutated cheese that crawls around in caveways and labyrinths. It looks most like a shapeless pasty-yellow and green-spotted lump. The gorgonzola is the result of a forgotten cheese that's been left in particularly moist and mildewy cave-tunnels. Mildew attacks the cheese, and the fungi eventually develops its own intelligence and ability to move - it simplys starts crawling around by itself.

Its strong smell attracts various prey, which it then attacks by falling down on or suddenly engulf. Thereafter it quickly starts eating the victim by sucking cells into its and replacing them with silicate waste-products - simply put, it petrifies the victim. The process is long and painful - it takes hours before a gorgonzola has snacked up a whole adventurer. A gorgonzola doesn't defend itself. It is gruesomely hard to kill, and it immediately attacks everything organic that touches it. The best way of getting rid of it is to drown it in alcohol and/or setting it on fire.

Advantages: Can't be hurt except by alcohol and fire.
Disadvantages: Stupid, Slow.
Weapons: Petrify-attack: Does One point of Whoop-ass damage per round if it touches skin. Leather armours are eaten through at one point of Protection per round.
15   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
hooper101 Posted - 01 Dec 2005 : 18:19:21
You have to give the gooda smell! And do not forget cheese sweats!
Crennen FaerieBane Posted - 30 Nov 2005 : 14:38:34
quote:
Originally posted by Kajehase

Here's my idea for the stats (which I'll work on in more detail when I'm not half-asleep) - use the Myconid from Monster Manual II, and apply the gelatinous-template from Savage Species on it. With a few minor changes in movement-rate and attacks, it should come fairly close.



I was thinking more of the Shambling Mound, that would it might already have a slow movement, and it's form already lends itself to a big goop of cheese.

C-Fb
Khaa Posted - 30 Nov 2005 : 13:15:29
wow, scary cheese. Makes me not want to eat this ham and cheese sandwich here. Maybe I will anyway...
Kajehase Posted - 30 Nov 2005 : 00:49:15
Here's my idea for the stats (which I'll work on in more detail when I'm not half-asleep) - use the Myconid from Monster Manual II, and apply the gelatinous-template from Savage Species on it. With a few minor changes in movement-rate and attacks, it should come fairly close.
hooper101 Posted - 29 Nov 2005 : 18:54:29
cucumbers are better than npcs
khorne Posted - 29 Nov 2005 : 17:05:39
Killer cheese......What`s next? Fiendish cucumber?
Vangelor Posted - 29 Nov 2005 : 10:12:04
And here I thought I'd never get to use my Fork of Fondue +3!
Belthor Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 18:35:15
Wow Kajehase, this thing bears a remarkable resemblance to something I found crawiling around the dairy drawer of my fridge a while ago......
sleyvas Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 15:27:38
<<It could also be a living spell based off of the Create Food and <<Water spell that had gone awry.

Lol, a living spell that combines create food and water, putrify food and drink, and unseen servant to hurl it about...... narsty
Crennen FaerieBane Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 15:14:15
It could also be a living spell based off of the Create Food and Water spell that had gone awry.

C-Fb
Thelonius Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 14:01:47
quote:
Hmm, sounds like an ooze to me. Well not ready to stat it some ideas.



The same I was thinking, it is strongly familiar to the oozes and jellys, I think Ghaundaur would be the proper patron deity then...
Kentinal Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 01:22:29
Hmm, sounds like an ooze to me. Well not ready to stat it some ideas.

Non inteligent

Contact poison, to paralyzed, each round of contact save DC increases by one,
Movement 10 or perhaps even 5 foot per round. Can not be flanked.

It appears there is DR 10/alcohol or fire.

Also treat contact as acid to get though metal armor.

Perhaps something like ablity (EX) Armor eating on contact each round reduces the AC of Armor by one point, if AC is reduced to 0 armor consumed.

You could up DR value, but the creature clearly would be acid resistant or inmune. It must have some abilty to keep faster moving food not moving.

The targets must have some chance of escaping being killed, though sometimes things like that require aid from others already.
Kajehase Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 01:21:23
Well, credit where credit is due: Rävsvans Förlag
The Sage Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 01:18:45
"In the kitchen, no one can hear you scream!"

I'm not sure how I would stat something like this, but I must admit it's an intriguing idea. I'd love to include something like this in my annual April Fool's Day one-shot adventure.

There are fungus-based creatures, so there is always the possibly that something like this "could" happen... I'm sorry I don't have anything more productive to add.

Thanks for the idea though Kaje .
Crennen FaerieBane Posted - 28 Nov 2005 : 01:16:26
That is a cool creature - nothing better than some Gorgonzola creeping through Undermountain!

C-Fb

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